Supporters of some governments seek to suppress
grief. Walter Brueggemann[1] points
out that it’s an effort to silence passion. Numbness comes when passion is eradicated, and
numbness causes potential critics to sit down and be still.
Scripture gives a vivid example. After her
rape by her brother Ammon, Tamar tears her clothing and begins weeping because she
has been defiled and her reputation has been destroyed. But her brother Absolom,
King David’s older son, minimizes her grief:
“Tamar put ashes on her head and tore
the ornate robe she was wearing. She put her hands on her head and went away,
weeping aloud as she went. Her brother Absalom said to her, “Has that Ammon,
your brother, been with you? Be quiet for now, my sister; he is your brother.
Don’t take this thing to heart.” And Tamar lived in her brother
Absalom’s house, a desolate woman.” -2 Samuel 13:29-30 NIV
“Be quiet … don’t take this thing to heart.”
The argument can be made that Absolom is dismissive in part because Tamar is a
woman, but it is even more tempting for him to treat a woman who is grieving as an object.
Absolom eventually puts Ammon to death. But that is an honor killing. Tamar is
never restored, never vindicated, even by her father. She is regarded as
chattel, used property.
The best of us have only moderate patience
with the grief of others. When a loved one dies and friends get the news,
sympathy can run its course after a week or so. For those who grieve it can feel
quite incredible that they themselves can be in such pain while others go about
their business.
And repressive governments and those who
support them can be even more indifferent. So it wasn’t surprising when Fox
News recently allowed Rush Limbaugh to denigrate students from a Florida high
school. They supported a march in memory of their recently slain classmates.
“Minutes after
interviewing a group of Parkland, Florida, students organizing
marches in response to the mass shooting at their school, “Fox
News Sunday” put conservative pundit Rush Limbaugh on the air to dismiss their
plans and condemn them for trying to advance a ‘political agenda.’”[2]
For those in power, advancing a political
agenda is the sole privilege of those in power.
Why should passion, especially grief, be
suppressed? Because grief is connected to death, and repressive governments do
not easily entertain the possibility of death. That is, they suppose that their
power should be unending. Criticism is an affront to their authority, and loss
of authority means loss of power and control. Thus critics are demonized. They
become enemies of the state. Which I suppose is fine as long as the critics
don’t become too numerous.
Scripture seldom tries to dampen grief. The
Psalmist expresses it this way:
“By the rivers of Babylon we sat and wept when we remembered Zion.” ( Psalm 137:1) And
Paul encourages the early followers of Christ “not to grieve as others do, who
have no hope.” (1 Thessalonians 4:13)
I think it would not occur to people of faith to disallow grief. Whether it
would occur to unbelievers is a different matter.
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